September 19, 2011

Idea: Vampire Victim Teething Toys

One of the most popular items you can buy for babies right now is Sophie, a teething toy shaped like a giraffe. There were more Sophie giraffes purchased last year in France, where Sophie originated, than there were babies born. This market needs to be tapped. And that’s why I propose a new line of teething toys shaped like characters from vampire stories.

What better thing is there for your baby to sink her new teeth into than a vampire victim?

As an example I’ve taken the character Jonathan Harker from Dracula and mocked up what he might look like as a teething toy:

Notice the curved arms for easy grasping, and lots of nubby bits for gnawing.

The line would start out with characters from Dracula since it’s public domain, but eventually expand to licensed characters like Sookie Stackhouse, Buffy, and that girl from the popular movies about the glittery vampire.


You don’t post often, but, oh, how I love it when you do. I have a friend who’s due in March. Do you think you can fast-track this design? Maybe ThinkGeek will be interested…

I love this. My kid is 2, but if I had another I would totally get some of these. In fact, he likes to put things in his mouth, maybe I would buy this for him anyway.

Think Geek has something similar, in fact…

Quickly Robin, to Kickstarter!

(I’d totally buy this.)

A whoopee cushion would do awsome if stronger. Babies would be crying and laughing all the time.

I think if you made a soother that made it look like the kid chewing it had Vampire fangs sticking out over their lower lip when they were sucking on it, it would sell like hot bloodcakes.

Which, admittedly might not sound that appealing to you or I, but we’re not exactly the target market here.

Vampire babies. That’s the ticket. Let’s start a Kickstarter. The video alone would make a hundred thousand dollars.

Or alternatively you could just buy an inferior one from the thinkgeek link above.


I’d have bought your toys when my boys were little — some say I’m perverse. Maybe so. One grew up to be a Marine. I love your blog!